Found the answer for dreamhost.
You need to make your own php.ini file when your database gets larger and
set the line in php.ini of your cgi-bin directory:
Memory_limit = 128M ; Maximum amount of memory a script may consume (8MB)
Well, I still have problems but this seems to lessen the errors...maybe i need to mess with the httpd.conf...
http://wiki.dreamhost.com/index.php/PHP.ini




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